Azra is 8 months old! She is growing so fast before my very eyes. She has 2 more new teeth in the upper jaw on the left and two more just about to come through on the right side. While mum goes off guiltily to work she is being looked after by her nanny. She seems to like her very much. When I am leaving in the morning and Emma comes in and says good morning to Azra, azra always gives her a big smile. When I come back they are usually playing together having fun, which is such a relief for me to see. Even though I have the luxury of working 4 days a week (although only until July) I still feel guilty going off to work and wish that I could spend more time with Azra, but it is a little bit difficult being the main breadwinner in the family yet being influenced either by maternal hormones telling me I should stay home or is it ideology telling me? I wouldn't be able to stay at home completely for too long but I would appreciate a bit more time. Now it is very rare that we are at home alone, but when we are it is great!
Azra has started crawling, although she has been doing it for a week or two now but hasn't picked up too much speed. She has discovered the joy of pulling books off the shelf, or magazines off the table. She is also in awe of our cat Yaramaz. She gets excited when he comes near and can't stop herself from touching (or pulling) his fur. I am hoping that he will be able to resist biting her when she does get overexcited to see him nearby. She claps her hands in excitement and when you put her on her back she also claps her feet! She picks up things with both hands and bangs them together. Maybe she has some sort of musical thing going on....every mother hopes to see such innate talents I imagine! She is getting better at doing yoga, pictured here in downward dog again! She still hasn't got much in the way of hair, just a little down on her head!


This is Azra's friend Ali, he is 5 weeks older than her but his mum has also started work again as well, so it will be difficult for them to find time to spend together unfortunately.

Azra is 7 months old

Azra in 2 days will be 7 months old. Where has that 7 months gone? She is developing amazingly. She has been sitting up by herself for almost 2 weeks. I am on holiday at the moment so I get to spend all day with her again, this I missed very much! I wish I could spend this time with her until she is 2, but economic reality makes this a bit difficult. Today as I was getting her to sleep I was lucky enough to witness some of her latest feats! I get her to sleep by laying her on her tummy and then patting both her bottom and her back rhythmically and massaging her back while laying next to her. In the last few days she has been less likely to lay still as I do this but today she decided to try out her new yoga poses. She has been doing the cobra for ages (getting up on her belly with her arms stright) but in the last few days she has also been doing cat and cow (all fours) and today she started downward dog (all fours and bum up in air)! Actually she had her face down in the sheets and was moving forward with the momentum! Such ingenious things these babies! She has sort of started eating solids in some sense. Actually we started with fruit when she was a bit over 6 months old, not really a meal but just to get the taste of foods. Our aim is not to abandon breastmilk but just to introduce her to foods. So we started with avocado which she seemed to like at first but then a few times later just let it all dribble out of her mouth. Then we went on to banana which she seemed to like sucking when it was whole but was not very interested in as a food. Then we went to cooked apple, a teaspoonful is ok- but only that much. I have discovered that she loves yoghurt. In the effort to try and get her to sleep better at night I give her yoghurt mixed with ground rice. It hasn't really worked yet to that effect though! I also mix in apple as that seems the only way she will eat it. Today I cooked carrot, she wasn't interested in that either until we mixed it with yoghurt!
The sleeping problem!!! Well as can be seen in the photo her two bottom teeth have come through, when these were coming through we had such a nightmare at night, at least crying every hour, so I started feeding her more. This was when I was going to work as well so I would be destroyed the next day getting a maximum of 1 hour of sleep at a time. Now the teeth have come through but the sleep has not got any better, just the crying at night has lessened! Let's hope this doesn't continue. These night times and work do not mix very well! Her bath times have become a lot of fun. She has many little ducks and books to accompany her in the bath. She no longer cries as she gets out of the bath. Except she does resist getting dressed so she will cry a little then. We are looking for a nanny for 10 days as Husnu is studying for an exam and I will be back at work. We have started interviewing, that's interesting. Foreigners are quite expensive but at least they speak English. The worrying thing is trust. How do you know you can trust them? Will they run off with your gorgeous baby, sell her kidneys or something. Interestingly and hopingly unrelated Turkey has an extremely high rate of missing and unfound children.....

Jetsetting!

We are back from our big trip to Oz! Azra did pretty well for a little baby I reckon. She coped with around a 24 hour trip there and back, only crying on the descent (I guess because of the pressure in her ears) and when there was turbulence meaning that I would have to take her out of the bassinet which of course would wake her up from her well deserved slumber. She met lots of new faces during her one month stay and only towards the end of the month cried when she met someone new - for instance my brother- her uncle Tony- but after the initial cry she became attached to him, sleeping on his shoulder more than once. I guess the crying might indicate that she is slowly getting the stranger concept. If this is so does that mean separation anxiety is around the corner? Tomorrow I start work after a 6 month break (how wonderful that was even if that time seemed to zoom by) so we will see if there are any problems caused with the separation. I doubt it seeing that I left her in Australia for 4 consecutive days with family from 8.30-6.30 and she was fine and then for short periods after that I also left her in the hands of family.
Anyway being in Australia was great even if I faced criticism for breastfeeding Azra solely until 6 months. I guess everybody thinks that what they know and what they did with their children is right and the best- just like the criticism that we face here for taking her out in the sun or not bundling her up like an eskimo. She spent loads of time in the great outdoors (as Australians are want to refer to it!) it was a bit strange as the weather has obviously been affected by global warming- one day 38 degrees and the very next day 25! I think she must have suffered a lot after coming back and being lucky to be taken out for half an hour in the cold. Now it is snow weather so we can't go outside for ling periods of time. Today even I froze!
She took about 3-4 days to adjust to the time difference but it wasn't so bad for her as our plane arrived at 7 in the morning and she had slept on and off for the previous 9 hours- her mum however had a different experience! Anyway her dad was pretty happy to see her. We were waiting in the airport as he had been held up in traffic and he came running over to her and couldn't take his eyes or hands off her- at least I got a greeting! Can't expect to much though I guess. He has been great with her ever since we got back allowing me to have a bit of time for myself. He starts looking after her tomorrow. He is not as scared as he was before we left for Australia but of course naturally he still has his fears about it. To be fair it is not something that Turkish men normally do. Today was the first time that he had looked after since us coming back to Turkey. He was stress-free on my return (unlike the previous few times) as now it is no hassle to get her to drink my milk from her bottle, much to her dad's relief! Thanks to my aunt who got her to accept the bottle now he is very relaxed!
Anyway while in Australia we went from Sydney to Melbourne and then to where my family is in Gloucester. Azra has become quite the jetsetter! She seemed to be happy wherever we were and with whoever we were with even if it took her a couple of days to get used to new beds and such. We spent her first Christmas in Gloucester with family. That was nice. You can see her christmas dress courtesy of our friend Mary. In the following photo are the four generations, Azra, me, her grandmother and her great grandmother and Azra's cousins. Everyone says that Azra looks like her youngest cousin- the one on my left.
Since we've been back we have been experimenting with food. She has always loved sucking on apple cores but we have not been able to get her to swallow any food yet. We have tried teething biscuits and avocado everything still comes dribbled out though!
She is now 6 months- well actually tomorrow she will be- a great celebration- her mum leaves her to return to fulltime work! I am not looking forward to it especially the 1 hour journey everyday there.
Until next time!

On the eve of Azra's first big trip

Azra is now 4 months and 3 weeks. She is around 7 1/2 kilos and about 63cm. She is growing out now! The first few months were growing up!One morning she discovered that she was able to such on Daddy's nose- how happy she was when she allowed her to- even if later on it made it purple from the bruising. She used his nose as a teether! She has discovered her feet and now when she is on her back she can't get enough of holding them. You try to put her nappy on and she is holding her feet, try to dress her she is holding her feet, put her on the bed, she is holding her feet! Maybe we would too if we could hold them as easy as babies can! Her other favourite thing is blowing air through her lips and creating little bubbles everywhere, especially all over her top. When she does this at 5am in the morning, which she does pretty much every morning, it is sort of so cute it that you don't get frustrated that she can't get back to sleep! We think she is beginning to go through teething as her mouth is like a saliva tap- it has been for the last 2 months- and for the last month she can't get enough of biting things!
It is 1 day and a bit before we fly to Australia. I am a little apprehensive as to what it will be like to spend 24 hours alone with Azra, most of it on the small space of a plane! If I weren't so worried about swine flu then others who are interested could take her and play with her if they so wanted, but now to do such a thing is probably too risky. I have been trying to get her to go to sleep earlier so that she could maybe adjust a little easier. It was working a little but tonight it is 11pm and we are still trying to get her to sleep! I think it will be quite a challenge on the plane! My apprehension is about this trip, but her dad's is about the month ahead. Actually he says it will be like a holiday! Let's see!

Azra's first holiday!

Azra is now 3 months and 3 weeks old. These photos were taken on the last day of Istanbul's Indian summer on Azra's first ferry boat ride. Now she is quite an experienced little baby. In almost 4 months she has been on a bus, a dolmus, a car, a ferry boat and now a plane. And she has cried on all but the dolmus (Dolmus in Turkish translates as 'stuffed' which is sometimes a very accurate description of these mini buses!). We took her on her first holiday last week. We went to Antalya. We were a little scared how it would be in terms of her crying etc. She did cry, inevitably, on the plane, in the restaurant at breakfast, in the restaurant at dinner, in the streets but at least at was easy to get her to sleep!!! No problems there. Maybe it was because of the heat. We left behind cold Istanbul and sweated in Antalya!
We had our first sea experience for the year, but Azra had the first one of her life. She was quite okay at the beginning. I guess she was expecting it to be like her bath. When she found that it wasn't quite as warm as that she started crying! I think she had a great time on holidays. In the hotel there was a continuous water fall and she loves this sound (don't we all!). And everyone, well many people, are entranced by babies and they were playing with her, cooing to her, admiring her. There may have been people doing quite the opposite especially when she was crying- or sometimes screaming- but she is a baby after all. I am sure we all did the same!
Nowadays she is chatting a lot and is discovering the limits of her voicebox and having a great time doing it! For example this morning she woke up at 5.30am to feed but then after her belly was full decided it was time to have a sing-song! Just what we love at 6am! It seems like she is just so enamoured with her new ly found talents that she just can't wait to practise them! She is also getting more and more active. 2 days ago she was laying on her tummy in her activity gym and then somehow managed to flip herself on to her back! When she did so she just cried! I guess she was completely startled by what she had done! I hadn't expected her to be doing things like this so early, it's a little bit scary! Hopefully it was just a freak occurrence! She is as adorable as ever as she chats or flaps away. She is getting easier to get to sleep at night, but maybe I shouldn't say anything, as inevitably it will change! She is having the same spitting up issues. I am not worrying about it anymore, reflux or whatever, she is obviously gaining plenty of weight and is healthy, so....
She now has her Australian passport so she is ready to become a jetsetter....only one more month to go and she will be!

Azra is 3 months old!

Azra is 3 months old. Where has that time gone? Have I done my best to enjoy her babyhood before it passes? This is what I ask myself. Everybody says that I will miss this period so I am trying to take advantage of it. We go to the park, take walks along the seaside, go shopping, friends come over to see her. We spend time with Ali (5 weeks older than Azra) and his mum. We play at home with toys. Now she is starting to pick things up and look at them and hold them. Here you can see her with her monkey. Actuallly she used to be scared of him as he was pretty much the same size, in the past month I have put some of her animals at the top of the chair so the when she lays down she can see and speak to them. She has very animated conversations consisting of 'oooh' and 'agoo' with both me and the animals!
When we go to the park I take her on the swing. She loves it! Because she loves this movement so much we decided to buy a rocking chair to help us in our struggle to get her to sleep. What used to be not such a problem has become quite difficult. It is very rare that we can get her to sleep before 10.30. Actually we start the process at 8.30-9pm with a bath and then I feed her. She goes to sleep I try to put her to bed but she wakes up immediately, so then the process starts again. Sometimes the process can go up to 2 hours. Fortunately not more than that though. The rocking chair has helped us a bit at least. We even play music for her now to help her. Some nights nothing helps though. And to make it worse the hours that she sleeps have become less. She used to sleep at least 5 hours but often 6 or 7 without waking up. Now we are lucky if she sleeps 5 hours. She often wakes up 2 hours after we have put her to sleep as well! I thought I had found a way to keep her asleep. We started putting a hot water bottle in her bed so that as we took her out of our warm arms she wouldn't notice so much as her bed would also be warm. Then I found that if I held her arms close to her chest and put my other hand on her stomach, shushed her to sleep and rocked her cradle that when she woke she would go immediately back to sleep when I would do this. When I found this I thought that I had the secrets cracked. However, it works for a while and then you try to do it a few nights later and it doesn't work. Everything changes as does her sleeping habits. The difficult thing is when you have been in control of your life, and then a baby comes along and you have no control whatsoever. If she is is pain, or is tired but can't sleep, hungry but refuses to feed, cries and won't stop whatever you do, there is nothing that you can do. This is difficult, especially for a person who like to be in control! That's when you focus on her smiles and the great things you see in front of you. I guess one has to learn to deal with not being in control!
She has started consciously touching things as she shows with the activity gym. That started about 2 weeks ago. She holds a toy up to look at it and examine it. She has also started smiling at herself in the mirror. She used to cry now however usually she smiles broadly. When we do baby yoga sometimes she even giggles. This is a rare occurrence though.
We took her for her 3 month check up last weekend. She was 5.75kg and 62 cm. So now she must be 6 kg. She is becoming noticeably heavier and chubbier. In fact for her passport photo she has a double chin! To think that she has to live with that photo for at least 5 years! I am even able sometimes to understand the meaning of her cries. It has taken me a while! I remember reading that around 3 weeks a mother can tell the meaning of her baby's cry....
I thought that we had found the reason for her acid reflux. For 10 days I ate no tomatoes, kiwi fruit, and such acidic foods and no chocolate. One weekend I ate tomatoes and chocolate and Azra was much worse after a week of being much better. I stopped eating them and after a few days she was measurably better, spitting up and crying much less. Now however, the spitting up has increased and returned to what it used to be but she is not crying like she used to. So have I found the reason???

Azra is 2 1/2 months old!

Azra is now 2 1/2 months old. She is growing like a weed! The last time we went to the doctor- 11 days ago she had put on 1 kg, so she is now 5 and probably a half kilos by now and 58cm long. She has also had many vaccinations! Here in Turkey a tuberculosis vaccination is required. My friends who have a tuberculosis vaccination look like someone bit their arm and that scar remains. Azra's hopefully will not look like that! But she is now Turkish with such a scar- not Australian! She is developing in many ways as well as getting bigger and chubbier. She smiles a lot now, although 1 second after or before that smile may be crying! Her emotional states can change very rapidly! She is discovering her body and other objects and she can stare at them for ages. She loves looking around. Today at the supermarket she was looking in wonder at the shelves. I guess to her they just look like an amazing array of bright colours and shapes. The doctor suspects that she might have acid reflux as she spits up a lot and drools- cries in pain etc etc. So in the last week I have been reading a lot about this. They say that eventually a baby understands that the milk is the source of the pain and may refuse to breastfeed. This happened for the first time today even though she spat up only once. Let's see what happens when she wakes up. I hope it doesn't continue. I am looking into my diet once again to see if it it the source of her problems. For 4 days I have not eaten any tomatoes, peppers, smoked turkey, citrus or acidic fruits and no chocolate. Other suspects (if it is from my diet) are milk (one that I am dreading to have to cut out of my diet- no cheese, no yoghurt etc etc....I am going to have to make milk out of rice and water!!! she seems to be sensitive to soy) and wheat are the most likely. I am trying the above for one week and see if there is a difference. We were also giving her special baby herbal tea for gas which I have stopped as it contains mint as part of the mixture which can apparently cause reflux. Apparently around 65% of babies suffer from reflux. It could be just a matter of waiting it out, there may not be a cause just a matter of an immature digestive system. Let's see. Having reflux would certainly explain why she cries, or screams as it is some of the time. We tilted her bassinet mattress and 30 minutes after her feeds I put her somewhere with a tilt and leave her alone with out any stimulation from me so as to keep her food down. If the problem is caused by what I eat then I certainly can understand why many women give up breastfeeding. It is not easy. It can be incredibly frustrating! But so wonderful at the same time. Just today (the same day we had breast refusal) Azra was looking up at me with a huge smile on her face (many times) while she was feeding!!! What a paradox! She is also strarting to chat with me. She can say things like 'agoo' and 'go' and she has even giggled with a little sound a couple of times over the last week. Sometimes when she smiles it is like she is about to give a great big belly laugh, she opens her mouth so wide and crinkles up her eyes in great joy. I can't wait until she starts to laugh.