Jetsetting!

We are back from our big trip to Oz! Azra did pretty well for a little baby I reckon. She coped with around a 24 hour trip there and back, only crying on the descent (I guess because of the pressure in her ears) and when there was turbulence meaning that I would have to take her out of the bassinet which of course would wake her up from her well deserved slumber. She met lots of new faces during her one month stay and only towards the end of the month cried when she met someone new - for instance my brother- her uncle Tony- but after the initial cry she became attached to him, sleeping on his shoulder more than once. I guess the crying might indicate that she is slowly getting the stranger concept. If this is so does that mean separation anxiety is around the corner? Tomorrow I start work after a 6 month break (how wonderful that was even if that time seemed to zoom by) so we will see if there are any problems caused with the separation. I doubt it seeing that I left her in Australia for 4 consecutive days with family from 8.30-6.30 and she was fine and then for short periods after that I also left her in the hands of family.
Anyway being in Australia was great even if I faced criticism for breastfeeding Azra solely until 6 months. I guess everybody thinks that what they know and what they did with their children is right and the best- just like the criticism that we face here for taking her out in the sun or not bundling her up like an eskimo. She spent loads of time in the great outdoors (as Australians are want to refer to it!) it was a bit strange as the weather has obviously been affected by global warming- one day 38 degrees and the very next day 25! I think she must have suffered a lot after coming back and being lucky to be taken out for half an hour in the cold. Now it is snow weather so we can't go outside for ling periods of time. Today even I froze!
She took about 3-4 days to adjust to the time difference but it wasn't so bad for her as our plane arrived at 7 in the morning and she had slept on and off for the previous 9 hours- her mum however had a different experience! Anyway her dad was pretty happy to see her. We were waiting in the airport as he had been held up in traffic and he came running over to her and couldn't take his eyes or hands off her- at least I got a greeting! Can't expect to much though I guess. He has been great with her ever since we got back allowing me to have a bit of time for myself. He starts looking after her tomorrow. He is not as scared as he was before we left for Australia but of course naturally he still has his fears about it. To be fair it is not something that Turkish men normally do. Today was the first time that he had looked after since us coming back to Turkey. He was stress-free on my return (unlike the previous few times) as now it is no hassle to get her to drink my milk from her bottle, much to her dad's relief! Thanks to my aunt who got her to accept the bottle now he is very relaxed!
Anyway while in Australia we went from Sydney to Melbourne and then to where my family is in Gloucester. Azra has become quite the jetsetter! She seemed to be happy wherever we were and with whoever we were with even if it took her a couple of days to get used to new beds and such. We spent her first Christmas in Gloucester with family. That was nice. You can see her christmas dress courtesy of our friend Mary. In the following photo are the four generations, Azra, me, her grandmother and her great grandmother and Azra's cousins. Everyone says that Azra looks like her youngest cousin- the one on my left.
Since we've been back we have been experimenting with food. She has always loved sucking on apple cores but we have not been able to get her to swallow any food yet. We have tried teething biscuits and avocado everything still comes dribbled out though!
She is now 6 months- well actually tomorrow she will be- a great celebration- her mum leaves her to return to fulltime work! I am not looking forward to it especially the 1 hour journey everyday there.
Until next time!

On the eve of Azra's first big trip

Azra is now 4 months and 3 weeks. She is around 7 1/2 kilos and about 63cm. She is growing out now! The first few months were growing up!One morning she discovered that she was able to such on Daddy's nose- how happy she was when she allowed her to- even if later on it made it purple from the bruising. She used his nose as a teether! She has discovered her feet and now when she is on her back she can't get enough of holding them. You try to put her nappy on and she is holding her feet, try to dress her she is holding her feet, put her on the bed, she is holding her feet! Maybe we would too if we could hold them as easy as babies can! Her other favourite thing is blowing air through her lips and creating little bubbles everywhere, especially all over her top. When she does this at 5am in the morning, which she does pretty much every morning, it is sort of so cute it that you don't get frustrated that she can't get back to sleep! We think she is beginning to go through teething as her mouth is like a saliva tap- it has been for the last 2 months- and for the last month she can't get enough of biting things!
It is 1 day and a bit before we fly to Australia. I am a little apprehensive as to what it will be like to spend 24 hours alone with Azra, most of it on the small space of a plane! If I weren't so worried about swine flu then others who are interested could take her and play with her if they so wanted, but now to do such a thing is probably too risky. I have been trying to get her to go to sleep earlier so that she could maybe adjust a little easier. It was working a little but tonight it is 11pm and we are still trying to get her to sleep! I think it will be quite a challenge on the plane! My apprehension is about this trip, but her dad's is about the month ahead. Actually he says it will be like a holiday! Let's see!

Azra's first holiday!

Azra is now 3 months and 3 weeks old. These photos were taken on the last day of Istanbul's Indian summer on Azra's first ferry boat ride. Now she is quite an experienced little baby. In almost 4 months she has been on a bus, a dolmus, a car, a ferry boat and now a plane. And she has cried on all but the dolmus (Dolmus in Turkish translates as 'stuffed' which is sometimes a very accurate description of these mini buses!). We took her on her first holiday last week. We went to Antalya. We were a little scared how it would be in terms of her crying etc. She did cry, inevitably, on the plane, in the restaurant at breakfast, in the restaurant at dinner, in the streets but at least at was easy to get her to sleep!!! No problems there. Maybe it was because of the heat. We left behind cold Istanbul and sweated in Antalya!
We had our first sea experience for the year, but Azra had the first one of her life. She was quite okay at the beginning. I guess she was expecting it to be like her bath. When she found that it wasn't quite as warm as that she started crying! I think she had a great time on holidays. In the hotel there was a continuous water fall and she loves this sound (don't we all!). And everyone, well many people, are entranced by babies and they were playing with her, cooing to her, admiring her. There may have been people doing quite the opposite especially when she was crying- or sometimes screaming- but she is a baby after all. I am sure we all did the same!
Nowadays she is chatting a lot and is discovering the limits of her voicebox and having a great time doing it! For example this morning she woke up at 5.30am to feed but then after her belly was full decided it was time to have a sing-song! Just what we love at 6am! It seems like she is just so enamoured with her new ly found talents that she just can't wait to practise them! She is also getting more and more active. 2 days ago she was laying on her tummy in her activity gym and then somehow managed to flip herself on to her back! When she did so she just cried! I guess she was completely startled by what she had done! I hadn't expected her to be doing things like this so early, it's a little bit scary! Hopefully it was just a freak occurrence! She is as adorable as ever as she chats or flaps away. She is getting easier to get to sleep at night, but maybe I shouldn't say anything, as inevitably it will change! She is having the same spitting up issues. I am not worrying about it anymore, reflux or whatever, she is obviously gaining plenty of weight and is healthy, so....
She now has her Australian passport so she is ready to become a jetsetter....only one more month to go and she will be!

Azra is 3 months old!

Azra is 3 months old. Where has that time gone? Have I done my best to enjoy her babyhood before it passes? This is what I ask myself. Everybody says that I will miss this period so I am trying to take advantage of it. We go to the park, take walks along the seaside, go shopping, friends come over to see her. We spend time with Ali (5 weeks older than Azra) and his mum. We play at home with toys. Now she is starting to pick things up and look at them and hold them. Here you can see her with her monkey. Actuallly she used to be scared of him as he was pretty much the same size, in the past month I have put some of her animals at the top of the chair so the when she lays down she can see and speak to them. She has very animated conversations consisting of 'oooh' and 'agoo' with both me and the animals!
When we go to the park I take her on the swing. She loves it! Because she loves this movement so much we decided to buy a rocking chair to help us in our struggle to get her to sleep. What used to be not such a problem has become quite difficult. It is very rare that we can get her to sleep before 10.30. Actually we start the process at 8.30-9pm with a bath and then I feed her. She goes to sleep I try to put her to bed but she wakes up immediately, so then the process starts again. Sometimes the process can go up to 2 hours. Fortunately not more than that though. The rocking chair has helped us a bit at least. We even play music for her now to help her. Some nights nothing helps though. And to make it worse the hours that she sleeps have become less. She used to sleep at least 5 hours but often 6 or 7 without waking up. Now we are lucky if she sleeps 5 hours. She often wakes up 2 hours after we have put her to sleep as well! I thought I had found a way to keep her asleep. We started putting a hot water bottle in her bed so that as we took her out of our warm arms she wouldn't notice so much as her bed would also be warm. Then I found that if I held her arms close to her chest and put my other hand on her stomach, shushed her to sleep and rocked her cradle that when she woke she would go immediately back to sleep when I would do this. When I found this I thought that I had the secrets cracked. However, it works for a while and then you try to do it a few nights later and it doesn't work. Everything changes as does her sleeping habits. The difficult thing is when you have been in control of your life, and then a baby comes along and you have no control whatsoever. If she is is pain, or is tired but can't sleep, hungry but refuses to feed, cries and won't stop whatever you do, there is nothing that you can do. This is difficult, especially for a person who like to be in control! That's when you focus on her smiles and the great things you see in front of you. I guess one has to learn to deal with not being in control!
She has started consciously touching things as she shows with the activity gym. That started about 2 weeks ago. She holds a toy up to look at it and examine it. She has also started smiling at herself in the mirror. She used to cry now however usually she smiles broadly. When we do baby yoga sometimes she even giggles. This is a rare occurrence though.
We took her for her 3 month check up last weekend. She was 5.75kg and 62 cm. So now she must be 6 kg. She is becoming noticeably heavier and chubbier. In fact for her passport photo she has a double chin! To think that she has to live with that photo for at least 5 years! I am even able sometimes to understand the meaning of her cries. It has taken me a while! I remember reading that around 3 weeks a mother can tell the meaning of her baby's cry....
I thought that we had found the reason for her acid reflux. For 10 days I ate no tomatoes, kiwi fruit, and such acidic foods and no chocolate. One weekend I ate tomatoes and chocolate and Azra was much worse after a week of being much better. I stopped eating them and after a few days she was measurably better, spitting up and crying much less. Now however, the spitting up has increased and returned to what it used to be but she is not crying like she used to. So have I found the reason???

Azra is 2 1/2 months old!

Azra is now 2 1/2 months old. She is growing like a weed! The last time we went to the doctor- 11 days ago she had put on 1 kg, so she is now 5 and probably a half kilos by now and 58cm long. She has also had many vaccinations! Here in Turkey a tuberculosis vaccination is required. My friends who have a tuberculosis vaccination look like someone bit their arm and that scar remains. Azra's hopefully will not look like that! But she is now Turkish with such a scar- not Australian! She is developing in many ways as well as getting bigger and chubbier. She smiles a lot now, although 1 second after or before that smile may be crying! Her emotional states can change very rapidly! She is discovering her body and other objects and she can stare at them for ages. She loves looking around. Today at the supermarket she was looking in wonder at the shelves. I guess to her they just look like an amazing array of bright colours and shapes. The doctor suspects that she might have acid reflux as she spits up a lot and drools- cries in pain etc etc. So in the last week I have been reading a lot about this. They say that eventually a baby understands that the milk is the source of the pain and may refuse to breastfeed. This happened for the first time today even though she spat up only once. Let's see what happens when she wakes up. I hope it doesn't continue. I am looking into my diet once again to see if it it the source of her problems. For 4 days I have not eaten any tomatoes, peppers, smoked turkey, citrus or acidic fruits and no chocolate. Other suspects (if it is from my diet) are milk (one that I am dreading to have to cut out of my diet- no cheese, no yoghurt etc etc....I am going to have to make milk out of rice and water!!! she seems to be sensitive to soy) and wheat are the most likely. I am trying the above for one week and see if there is a difference. We were also giving her special baby herbal tea for gas which I have stopped as it contains mint as part of the mixture which can apparently cause reflux. Apparently around 65% of babies suffer from reflux. It could be just a matter of waiting it out, there may not be a cause just a matter of an immature digestive system. Let's see. Having reflux would certainly explain why she cries, or screams as it is some of the time. We tilted her bassinet mattress and 30 minutes after her feeds I put her somewhere with a tilt and leave her alone with out any stimulation from me so as to keep her food down. If the problem is caused by what I eat then I certainly can understand why many women give up breastfeeding. It is not easy. It can be incredibly frustrating! But so wonderful at the same time. Just today (the same day we had breast refusal) Azra was looking up at me with a huge smile on her face (many times) while she was feeding!!! What a paradox! She is also strarting to chat with me. She can say things like 'agoo' and 'go' and she has even giggled with a little sound a couple of times over the last week. Sometimes when she smiles it is like she is about to give a great big belly laugh, she opens her mouth so wide and crinkles up her eyes in great joy. I can't wait until she starts to laugh.

Azra is 54 days old

At the moment Azra is in her expressive period. She is now smiling a lot. This morning for example I leant over her bassinet to get her out and she just smiled at me. This smiling lasted for what seemed like at least a few minutes. They even pass into giggles at time! Her smiles are so beautiful! For me this is what makes being a mother so special. I don't do anything special to make her smile, she just smiles, sometimes it is in response to my smile sometimes just spontaneous. It's such a lovely thing! I can't imagine life without her. Although I am glad I waited this long for her, I don't know how I would have survived if many years ago she had come into my life- now was the right time.
She is 'talking' a lot now. Lots of ohs and all sorts of language that she knows but we don't have access to! I guess she is just imitating what she hears? I love it when I leave her somewhere, on her chair for example and while looking at some inanimate object she chatters away. Sometimes she is even smiling then! The other day I left her laying on the chair and the sunlight was dancing across the top of the chair. As she was watching the movements of the sun on the chair she was chattering and cooing away or the other day I left her with her stuffed monkey and it was as if she was chattering away to the monkey- Husnu says I am overusing my imagination! A few weeks ago I was thinking that it wasn't great being a baby in that they can't express what they want, they suffer pain and can't express what the problem is. Now however I think it is lovely to be a baby as I see Azra revelling in the most simple things and getting pleasure out of it. We have forgotten such simple pleasures! Even her many many stretches as she wakes up after a sleep are refreshing!
When she gets the chance and a little support she loves standing up. I think I remember hearing that this is a reflex and that it will disappear for a while. Well she certainly seems to enjoy it. I think she will be much happier when she can do things for herself an attains a bit of independence. That will be a little while yet. She is also much better during the evenings, we can sometimes even have dinner without having to get up and soothe her by walking around or rocking her. While it is still summer we are putting her to bed about 9pm, so that means she is still up while we eat. She is usually asleep by 9.30 /10 and then wakes up around 4-5 and then again at 7-8 and then again at 9-10. She sleeps again in the afternoon for 2-3 hours as well if I'm lucky, if not then I take her for a walk in the carrier and then she sleeps. I made her a little sunhat. At least people say less things about taking a baby out in the sun now. I never took her out in the middle of the day and also never exposed her to the sun for more than a few minutes while walking but still people would say something about it (apparently people will always have something to say here about babies and kids no matter what you do) and think that it is actually a good thing especially in terms of vitamin D intake. Well life is a little easier now that I put her hat on (in terms of people's comments)! But anyway she is so cute in it. Now I guess it is better and she only gets a little sun on her face and elsewhere.
Breastfeeding is much easier now. She feeds usually around every 2 hours rather than what was like every hour, and she can finish within 10 minutes. Here in Turkey the WHOs suggestions of exclusive breastfeeding for the first 6 months and then supplemental food for upto 2 is taken very seriously. Where there is a choice in terms of birth (although weighed heavily towards cesarean) it seems to be taken for granted that you will breastfeed. Doctors make the assumption, friends etc. In fact I know of no Turkish woman who didn't breastfeed. It is quite different than in the west! I remember reading of two girls in Australia and there reaction to seeing a woman breastfeeding in public. Apparently they said 'That's gross. Can't she afford bottles?' This is surely perverted values. Here we have the same problem towards natural birth- it as almost assumed that one will have a cesarean! Azra's doctor was proudly telling us how his hospital is so oriented towards natural birth. He got us to guess that numbers as he proudly told us that the number of births in July was 60. I thought it must have been pretty good for him to be so proudly telling us. Out of 60 births 25 were normal births....and apparently that is something to be proud of. I think it is shameful! Back to breastfeeding though- I must admit though that breastfeeding was difficult at first (and still is at times as Azra cries inexplicably as I try to feed her!) and took some getting used to and a lot of reading about and consultation. I can understand why some might give up, but it is such a beautiful thing and such a wonderful way to bond. On a more selfish note, only you can bond that way with the child! It is also a nice way to make you slow down and just be with the baby.

Azra's 43 days old!

Well we are past the postnatal and newborn period and the magic Turkish 40 days. Maybe this is so in many cultures but for the first 40 days in Turkey the baby shouldn't be taken outside and shouldn't have visitors outside of the family - as I understand. My friends were joking that the mother should be in bed in this period and fed 'lohusalik sherbet'- lohusa means postnatal. Unfortunately, I don't even know what this sherbet is made from, let own spending this time in bed! They say that this 40 days is the most difficult. I guess it is the getting used to the baby, the stress this may cause in your relationship, getting used to being tied to the house (in the case of the woman unfortunately- no such thing for the man- although I am not really complaining I haven't left Azra for more than 20 minutes when I have had to do something and as yet I can't imagine leaving her). Let's see if this is still the case in a month. I have come to think that no matter how much men think they want a child that it is really only the woman who really understands what it entails and who is prepared to deal with those things. Maybe I am wrong but it certainly seems to be like this. For a woman who is breastfeeding it is much more difficult, especially in terms of freedom. Perhaps however it is hormones that helps women deal with this - perhaps??? But anyway the first 40 days are over and if that is the most difficult part then we should be able to cope with what is coming. What was difficult? The constant breastfeeding- sometimes I would feed her only to have to feed her another 20 minutes later. Or the crying, the gas problems, being able to go to the toilet or have a shower in amongst all of these things, getting used to be 3 people rather than 2 people and a cat! Not understanding what the problem was but knowing there was a problem. Now we are slowly getting used to our new life and wouldn't change it for the world!
Here we have Husnu and Azra. It looks like there is some resemblance afterall, even if not physically! If only we could get Azra to sleep so easily all the time life would be much easier!
In the last week we have seen a bit of development in Azra. Everyday pretty much she gets bigger and in the last week we have seen her limbs fill out and become baby plump! She is about 4.4kg now. Her sight has developed quite a bit, you can see now that she is actually looking at things rather than just looking into space. When I take a photo now she looks at the camera even without me saying anything! Yesterday she saw me putting the carrier on and she even stopped crying and started brightening . She is regularly smiling at me now, even when doing mundane things as changing her nappy. She smiled at her dad for the first time yesterday as well- made his day! She can sit up better now as well. She seems to hear as she turns her head towards sounds. She is getting over her gas problem, not to say that it doesn't cause her problems on occasions but she lays in bed (or wherever) merrily passing wind and there is usually no crying to be heard- maybe I shouldn't say this, maybe tonight she may have gas pains!!! She seems to have gotten over the green poo problem. I guess it is just a matter of the development of the digestion system. She also seems to not be as unhappy at night. We had a regular crying hour from 8-9 sometimes earlier sometimes later and that doesn't seem to be as regular or at least as intense anymore or maybe we are getting used to it and getting better at handling it! We would regularly be practising our singing skills, strengthening our forearms carrying her on her stomach as she likes, dancing with her. Again though, maybe I shouldn't say anything as we never know what will happen tonight! I like this photo. It is like she is thinking, she was twirling her fingers at the time and touching her chin with one of her fingers.
And the last one is the first time she wore a dress. This probably won't happen much (at least when I am dressing her) so I thought I should record it! We bought reusable nappies a week ago. My environmental conscious got to me and I bought a trial pack. Today I got around to finally trying them. As soon as I put the nappy on, Azra started crying. I guess she didn't like it, and it was huge! There were 4 layers, 2 of towelling, one of cotton and one of leakproof outer pants. It would be rather difficult to dress her in some outfits with such big pants! Anyway they only lasted for about an hour! I guess I am too used to disposable nappies like Azra. You would have to change her after every toilet going pretty much otherwise she would end up a mess! They don't absorb like disposable nappies. I will have to satisfy my environmental conscious with everything else I do- recycling, buying locally, using cloth and water to clean her bottom rather than wetwipes etc. I can't imagine what made me think I could use reusable nappies. Lucky Azra didn't like them! I try to imagine being wrapped with a similar product- uggghh!